Thursday, November 19, 2015

Monologue Mania Day # 646 Magnet Man! by Janet S. Tiger Nov.19, 2015

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Monologue Mania Day # 646 Magnet Man! by Janet S. Tiger  Nov.19, 2015

                                                    Magnet Man!
                                           by Janet S. Tiger 
                                     (c) 2015 all rights reserved 

        (Carrying a huge pile of covers and pillows onstage, the young man staggers and falls into them, instantly asleep.  If he can be onstage asleep to start, this is even better.  He hears a noise, it is the alarm on his phone?  He tries to shut it off, but it keeps at him, he struggles to turn it off)

Oh, man, it's so hard to find the buttons with my eyes closed!  Siri - turn off the alarm!

       (The alarm continues)

Siri!  PLEASE turn off the alarm!

       (Still continues)

Oh, no, I forgot.....I dropped Siri in the pool!  All I have now is......what is the voice of nothing?  Hmm, there's a good question for Twitter......

       (The alarm stops, he drops into the covers)

Oh, that is so alarm....why did I have it on?

       (Bolts up)

I think.....I have a test today!

       (Starts to sink down into the covers)

Five minutes won't make a difference.....

        (Sinking back, looks at watch)

Oh, no, I must've hit the snooze thingy a few times already!

         (Peers at the watch)

I shoulda been up thirty minutes ago!

         (Falls back into the covers, starts to struggle with them)

I wanna sleep!  I need sleep!  I'm a growing 22 year old boy!


          (The covers are winning and he is losing)

Noooooo!  (As if reading) There is a magnet in my head and a magnet in the bed!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And the magnet in my keeps me in the bed!

          (He twitches and tries to rise, unsuccessfully.)

I must fight the magnet......I must fight........

I must................


           (Loud snoring is heard.  Then he bolts up)

And that is exactly how it happens every day....
In every way
I fight the magnet in my head.....
And the magnet in my bed............

           (He bows, turns to leave, stops,looks back)

Thank you!

            (He listens, jumps for joy)

I won!  I won the prize!  I get to perform my performance art for the President!

            (He runs offstage, triumphant, then runs back to the covers and pillows.......puts a pillow on his head, and......back into bed!  Not the end of sleep.....)

Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8


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