Sunday, June 17, 2018

Monologue Mania Day # 1584 Guarantee by Janet S. Tiger (c) June 18, 2018

Welcome to Monologue Mania- one new free* monologue a day- -and still going!
Today is Day # 1584!  To look at the other 1583 titles - click here
  first   year - Feb. 13, 2014 - Feb. 12, 2015  second year -  Feb. 13, 2015 - Feb. 12, 2016  third year -  Feb. 13, 2016  four year Feb. 14, 2017 today!                 
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Monologue Mania Day # 1584 Guarantee by Janet S. Tiger (c) June  18, 2018         
                                A monologue by Janet S. Tiger (c)  2018   all rights reserved      

       (The actor enters, holding a letter, reads)

"I am writing to your company about your  extra brite Flasher flashlight.  I love it because it is very bright."

People love that bright light!

(reads) "However.."

       (Shakes head)

Not a good word......

(reads)  "On your commercial, you say the Flasher Flashlight is also guaranteed to be super durable - and you show that even when a tank drives over it, it works great." 

That's one of our best selling points!

(reads)  "And you can smash it with a hammer and no problem!  You even had an elephant sit on it and NO PROBLEMS!"

       (Smiles, nods, continues reading, shakes head)

"But when the flashlight fell off my broke!  So I am requesting another as per your guarantee."

       (Starts to laugh, gets hysterical)

No flashlight for you!  The guarantee is only for tanks and elephants and hammers!  There is no guarantee for when it falls off a nightstand!

       (Turns to leave, stops, looks back)

How would we make any money?

        (Guaranteed to exit with your money)

Note: A few words about 'free' -  all these monologues are protected under copyright law and are free to read, free to perform and video as long as no money is charged. Once you charge admission or a donation, or include my work in an anthology, you need to contact me for royalty 

Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315      
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983

Swedenborg Hall 2006-8