Saturday, June 3, 2017

Monologue Mania Day # 1206 Rest in Peas by Janet S. Tiger (c) June 3, 2017

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Monologue Mania Day # 1206 Rest in Peas by Janet S. Tiger (c) June 3, 2017  

                                       Rest in Peas (c)
                                        by Janet S. Tiger  (c) 2016 all rights reserved 

        (A man enters in dark clothing, holding a metal can, which he lifts up)

Peas.  I wish you all peas and quiet!

That's what my mother used to say when she made a toast.  Always a strange toast, but my mother loved to make people laugh.....and she believed in peas.

She would tell me that....peas would solve the problems of the world.  As I got older, I asked her if she meant, 'peace' and she would laugh.  'How can there be peace with so many crazy people!'  She would explain that in any pot of food, you could fix any mistake with a can of peas.....or two cans if the mistake was a large pot.

My father would shake his head and just look at his food.  My mother would pick up the can of peas and shake it - 'and if someone is not quiet, just hit them with the can!  Peas and quiet!  Simple!

When she was very ill, and the priest had been called for, we came into the hospital room and it was not the happiest of occasions.... my mother was not really conscious.  Then, all of a sudden, Father O'Halloran entered, and he was a bit nervous, holding a bag.

My mother rallied when she saw him...'Did you bring it?'  He nodded and she beckoned him closer......'give it to me'....and he took a can of peas from the bag and handed it to her.  She looked at it and smiled....'Bury me with this can!  I want in peas!'

And when everyone laughed, she leaned back, smiling and she died.

We tried not to laugh, but we couldn't stop.  The nurses came in and looked to see what was going on, and when they heard my mother had passed, they were horrified, but when they saw the can, and heard....they started laughing, too.

Today is the anniversary of the passing of my mother - and I wish for her what she always wanted for the whole world....

        (He turns to leave, stops, looks back)

Peas and quiet....


Note: A few words about 'free' -  all these monologues are protected under copyright law and are free to read, free to perform and video as long as no money is charged. Once you charge admission or a donation, or include my work in an anthology, you need to contact me for royalty 
Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315      
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8