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Monologue Mania Day #443 Mayday by Janet S. Tiger May 1, 2015
Mayday
A monologue by Janet S. Tiger © all rights reserved tigerteam1@gmail.com
(Stoned is the best word for the young man who enters. Or perhaps VERY stoned is a better description. He is looking at his phone as if it is some sort of magical thing.)
Whoooooaaaa! This is amazing!
I mean, it's the first of May, May Day.....and I just had an accident, and I have to call for help and that's like the word......Mayday! Talk about coincidences....
(The phone rings, he looks at it and smiles. He pushes a button)
Mayday! Mayday! Oh, maybe I shouldn't be talking and texting......can anyone hear me?
I was driving and....
(Looks around)
I don't see a car, so, maybe I wasn't driving.....I was walking, and all of a sudden....
(The phone rings again and he is mystified.)
So who was I talking to then? I heard it ring, and then I pressed this button.....
(He goes to press a button, stops, phone keeps ringing)
Maybe this is the wrong button.....
What about this one?
(He presses another button, hears noises, puts phone to ear)
Hey, you're there.....I just called to say....Mayday!
Today is...May Day.....so Mayday!
(He listens)
What happened? I'm not exactly sure, ya know? Did I tell you anything before?
(Listens, person is yelling)
Okay, Dad, I got it! I did something stupid, but that's no reason to yell at me! I called for help, ya know? And do you think this is helping?
(He turns to leave, stops, looks at phone)
Oh, yeah, the punchline.....you're right, I did forget that....
(He looks at the audience)
And the punchline is........
(His mouth stays open, then he closes it and runs off)
Mayday, mayday! I forgot the last line.....
(He exits into an actor's nightmare)
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Janet S. Tiger
858-736-6315
JanetSTigerMonologueMania.blogspot.com
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Playwright-in-Residence
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8
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