Sunday, March 4, 2018

Monologue Mania Day # 1480 The Cheese Killed the Husband by Janet S. Tiger (c) March 4, 2018

Welcome to Monologue Mania- one new free* monologue a day- -and still going!
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Monologue Mania Day # 1480 The Cheese Killed the Husband by Janet S. Tiger (c) March 4, 2018      

                          The Cheeses Killed the Husband


                                                  A monologue by Janet S. Tiger 
                                                   © 2018 all rights reserved 
                                                      tigerteam1@gmail.com

     (Actor enters, reading from a tablet)

I love my phone, and my tablet, and my computer.  What would I do without them?

And yet, sometimes when I dictate into them.....it comes out different than what I actually said....like this...... (reading)  'go off on a tangerine....'  I said ...go off on a TANGENT.

Hmm, that's an interesting idea....how would one go off on a tangerine?  Riding one would be difficult due to the shape of course....but, not impossible.....

I guess I have gone off on a tangerine....I mean tangent.....because this is the one that relaly got to me -  do I speak so unclearly.  I distinctly said....'the girl implies she's' but it typed out as....

'the girl implies CHEESE killed her husband!'

Wait a minute....how would cheese kill someone?  I think, I think I have an idea....for a new murder mystery!

Maybe the mistakes aren't so bad after all!  But who would the killer be?  Camembert?  Muenster?

          (Turns to leave, stops, looks back)

It would have to be......limberger!

            (Exits holding nose)
  This was based on a true story - the names of the cheeses have been changed to protect the guilty......
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Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315                CaregiversAnon.org
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983

Playwright-in-Residence
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8