first year - Feb. 13, 2014 - Feb. 13, 2015
I've continued with a monologue a day until the spirit moves me to stop, so if you have any ideas for a monologue you want me to write, please let me know at tigerteam1@gmail.com.
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Monologue Mania Day #488 Helena and Jacaranda (for Two Sisters) by Janet S. Tiger June 15, 2015
Helena and Jacaranda
(for Two Sisters )
Also not a monologue by Janet S. Tiger © all rights reserved
2015
tigerteam1@gmail.com
(Lynn
is gathering items trying to leave her father's apartment, but then Pam is seen
opening the door, waving a handful of papers)
PAM
- What in the hell is this supposed to be? Are you recording our
conversations?
(Lynn tries to leave, but Pam blocks her)
PAM
- You can't claim your phone isn't working, I am standing right in front
of you!
(Lynn hits her head)
LYNN
- Must be a bad connection, gotta go....
(Pam stands in front of Lynn)
PAM
- You are writing a screenplay about our family, and I, for one, am very
annoyed!
LYNN-
Not to worry, I changed all the names....see....
(She points to a page)
LYNN
- This character is named Samantha.....
PAM
- And is called SAM, instead of my name which is PAM! I hate the
name Sam! Can't you pick some interesting names, like ...I could be Helena and
you would be....Jacaranda!
LYNN
- So let me get this straight, you're Helena, that's a queen's name, right?
(Pam nods)
LYNN - And I would be...Jacaranda? Isn't that a snake?
(Pam nods)
LYNN - And I would be...Jacaranda? Isn't that a snake?
PAM
- That's anaconda - Jacaranda is a tree!
LYNN
- So...... I would be a tree?
PAM
- With beautiful purple flowers.....
LYNN
- (Remembers) Of all the trees in the world, that's the only tree that I hate! I mean, I love the
purple flowers, but that tree is barren for fifty weeks
out of the year...then pretty for two weeks and it leaves behind dirt and
sticky stuff all over the cement that takes a whole year to clean
up! (Thinks) So that's what you think of me......
PAM - .A beautiful mess....that's you in a nutshell!
PAM - .A beautiful mess....that's you in a nutshell!
LYNN
- I'm sure not gonna argue about the nutshell......but
(thinking) .....and how come you think I'll change the names to suit YOU! If you want to name the characters, write your own movie!
(thinking) .....and how come you think I'll change the names to suit YOU! If you want to name the characters, write your own movie!
PAM
- - If that's the way you're gonna be, I just might!
LYNN
- And keep your hands off my private papers!
PAM
- Or what?
LYNN
- Or else, that's what!
PAM
- Or else what? You'll tell Daddy? You never told on me, that
would make you a....a...snitch!
LYNN
- I am not a snitch! ((Sputtering) Or
else.....I'll...I'll....
(She gets an idea, runs to the refrigerator and pulls out a cantaloupe, waving
it at Pam)
LYNN
- Or else this......
(She moves towards Pam, who shrinks in horror)
PAM
No! Not a....not a....
LYNN-
Can't even say the word, can you?
PAM
- Where did that come from? You and Daddy promised....no.....(she truly can't say the word) It's like a big pile of kryptonite!
LYNN
- Not kryptonite......just a....(hisses)...a cantaloupe!
PAM
- (Horrified) No!!!!!!
(She runs as Lynn chases her with the cantaloupe)
PAM
- Keep that thing away from me!
LYNN
- If you ever read my papers again, I'll.....I'll......
(She stops running, goes to Pam's purse and holds the cantaloupe close)
PAM
- Not my favorite purse! I love that purse...it's a Kenneth Cole!
(Lynn holds the cantaloupe near the purse)
LYNN
- This is a warning....
PAM
- You wouldn't....you couldn't!
LYNN
- I would and I will!
(She now takes the cantaloupe over to the papers Pam dropped and rubs the
cantaloupe all over them)
LYNN
- Try reading them now!
PAM
- I hate you! You did this to me when we were kids! You would
take my favorite cover and threaten to rub apple on it because I hated apples!
LYNN-
I only did it because you drove me nuts!
PAM
- I can't drive you nuts now - you're already there!
LYNN
- Don't pick nits with me, I have truth .......and fruit on my side!
PAM
- (Angry and horrified, but rebounds) But I have a secret
weapon.....
LYNN
- And that would be what? I love fruit! You can't disgust me
because I love all matter disgusting things! I love everything!
PAM
- (Wicked) Daddy!
LYNN
- I love Daddy!
PAM
- But you forgot, I am the snitch and (sing song) I'm going to tell Daddy!
(She runs from
room, with Lynn chasing her, brandishing the cantaloupe as a weapon of mass
destruction. End of scene)
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Janet S. Tiger
858-736-6315
JanetSTigerMonologueMania.blogspot.com
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Playwright-in-Residence
Swedenborg Hall 2006-83
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