Sunday, March 27, 2016

Monologue Mania Day #774 Real Democracy (for Senior Channel) by Janet S. Tiger (c) Mar. 27, 2016

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Monologue Mania Day #774 Real Democracy (for Senior Channel) by Janet S. Tiger (c) Mar. 27, 2016 
                                        Real Democracy
                                                            (for Senior Channel)
                                                      A monologue by Janet S. Tiger 
                                  © Feb. 1, 2012  all rights reserved 
        (An older black woman comes onstage – this is a Southern woman with an attitude.  She is glaring at the audience, arms crossed and she is irritated as…heck.)

Democracy.  Everyone talkin’ about democracy like they know what it is.    I lived through lotsa stuff in my time – some good, a lot bad and I’m gonna tell you about democracy.  There is only one true hear me?  Listen close!

Time is democracy.

There – betcha didn’t think I was gonna say that.  Well, it is THE only democracy.

Think about it – if you can. 

We all get 24 hours in a day.  Every single one of us.  That’s it.  No one- not Rockefeller or Donald Trump or even President Obama gets more or less than 24 hours.

(Imitates silly voice) ‘Oh, but they have people to help them, they have money, they can do more than I can’  (Back to herself)  As my momma used to say when we would ask how the cows got pregnant - Bull!

Time is not money.  Time is not fleeting – anyone who’s ever been waitin’ in a hospital knows that.  Time IS precious.

I know about time because I have lived 92 years on this earth, and all I ever get – just like every other person – is 24 hours.

And – just like everyone else – I don’t know which will be my last.

When you live long enough – you get to see a lot.  And you can see that if you are lucky to get enough time, you get to be old – and that is the great equalizer.

No courtroom, no Supreme Justices, no law can make us all equal – but time sure does.

I am a woman, I am black, I am a lesbian and I am from the South.  Now, maybe people look at me and they can’t see where I’m from till I open my mouth, and maybe they can’t tell about my preference for women…..but to describe me, they all use the same words.  Old.

The tourists see me sittin’ on the bench in the park and need directions, they -of all colors -say – ‘go ask that OLD lady which way is it to the museum’.

Old lady.  Sometimes they say – old black lady…but it is never black old lady!

Old.  That’s the first thing they see about you.  In some ways, it’s better than what I used to get called.   But in other ways – the way that I would like to be young again way – this is bad, too.

But it don’t matter what you are - you can be rich and famous and it don’t matter.  If you’re sittin’ on that bench, they’re gonna call you ‘old’.

I may be irritated about everythin’ in my life – and the Lord knows I am irritated (builds on this) I’m irritated about how I can’t eat anything solid, how my kids don’t visit enough, how my bones ache, and my eyesight is goin’, how I don’t know if my Social Security is gonna pay the bills, how even though I could live to see the day when we elected a black President!- Hallelujah -  no matter what – I am irritated that I AM STILL OLD! 

(Calms a little)  And I ain’t getting’ any younger.  And neither is anyone else.

I saw somma you look funny when I said ‘my kids’ – well, just because I’m gay don’t mean I couldn’t be married for 15 years to the father of those kids.  Didn’t anyone teach you biology?

My kids used to ask me when you know if you finished with something – like when is the pie finished?  I’d say, ‘you’ll know’   When do you know when you’re finished with your boyfriend and it’s time to move on -  (nods her head)  - ‘you’ll know.’

When you’re young, it’s all about getting’ stuff finished.  Finishin’ the dishes, finishin’ shoppin’ and puttin’ stuff away.  (Imitates a man’s voice)  ‘Are you finished yet?’

But when you get to be my age, you don’t wonder about finishin’ – you wonder if you even put the soap in the washer!  You wonder about if you even finished the sentence you started – let alone the complete thought.

However, the issue of being finished – well, that’s another matter.  Because when your time comes and you are dead, you are finished for good.  And that is the ultimate democracy.

And now, I am finished. 

            (She goes to walk off, turns back)

Not dead, that is, just finished with this.

            (As she goes offstage, she can be heard muttering to herself)

Don’t know why they want to hear about old people…..but at least I’m getting’ some free food outta this….Maybe I’ll live long enough to see a woman President…(thinks) …an OLD black woman President….(laughs) now that would be the day!.....(thinks)  Nah, I don’t think I’m gonna live that long….

           (She exits, in time...)

Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8

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