Wednesday, December 10, 2014

Monologue Mania Day #301 by Janet S. Tiger Please Dec. 10, 2014

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  Monologue Mania Day #301 by Janet S. Tiger Please Dec. 10, 2014 

                                 A monologue by Janet S. Tiger   © all rights reserved

         (The man is in his thirties, maybe forties, wearing a suit, but it is obvious he's not used to wearing a suit.  He removes his jacket, holds it.)

I ..I hope you don't mind if I take this off, it's a little warm in here.

          (He loosens his tie)

I've never spoken to a group like this, I mean I had trouble getting up in class to talk, so, talking to you here in the Legislature, before this committee, before the cameras....

         (He shields his eyes, takes out a paper from his pocket)
My name is Jason Billings, and I am here.....

          (Looks at paper closely)

(reading) I am here to talk about the law you are considering, bill number A2186, which is in favor of assisted suicides......

         (Takes a deep breath, stops reading)

I had a whole thing written about all the reasons to allow assisted suicide, I mean my wife helped me and everything, and if you want, I can show it to you later.  But all the other people before me, they all talked about the things I have on this paper...... 

         (He waves it at them)

....and that only leaves me with what I know, and my wife didn't want me to talk about that, but I'm going to anyhow.  You see, I've worked for the city on the trolley line for almost 15 years, and after five years, I got to drive the trolleys, and I love it.  I mean, I love the people and being outside, and driving in all the weather.  You have to be alert, and you have to be friendly and pay attention, and have a sense of the crazy things people will do......but, you see, I haven't been able to drive for this last year.  I've been on...(says it almost bitterly).....on administrative leave.  Which is a fancy way of saying they won't let me drive.....because I ....(hard for him to say)....I killed someone with my trolley.

         (Puts his head down, then lifts it, squares his shoulders)

I'm not supposed to say that, I'm supposed to say...'there was an accident, and a person attempting suicide lay down on the tracks, and I did not have sufficient time to stop, so........

          (Shakes his head)

I don't care what they want me to say!  I killed him!  I struck another human being and they are dead!  And they can tell me that I was just an 'unlucky part' of this man's suicide, that it was not my ...fault...but I can't even drive a car anymore!

I truly believe that if that man could have committed suicide with help from a doctor, maybe he would not have been out there, on a rainy night……

          (He is seeing the night, on his knees now)

…… lying face down on the tracks in a black jacket and black pants so that I couldn't even see him until I was on top of him!

         (He almost breaks down, gets a hold of himself, wipes his forehead, removes his tie)

Maybe people will still do crazy things if you pass this law, maybe they'll use.....

         (He holds up his tie)

Anything they can get their hands on......maybe.  But maybe not. 

I realize that man probably was in such pain when he did that, he wasn't thinking straight.  But maybe, just maybe, if we acknowledge here and now that not everyone wants to live, it is not a crime, but a right to take our own lives if we choose, and that  maybe people will be able to go and take their own lives without making other people help....   - people like me, people who are really not prepared to help someone else take their life...... so maybe others will not have to go through what I went through, and still go through every day…..and night…in my dreams….in my nightmares…..

        (He stands up straight, puts his jacket back on)

So I'm asking you to truly consider this bill and pass it.....

          (He turns to leave, stops, looks back)


          (He exits.  Not the end of this story)  


Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315 
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8

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