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Monologue Mania Day # 1347 Going the Way of the Worry Free (for Caregivers Anonymous) by Janet S. Tiger (c) Oct. 22, 2017
Going the Way of the Worry Free
A monologue by Janet S. Tiger © All rights reserved 2017
(Woman enters, laughing, the group greets her)
GROUP (Talks over each other) How was your trip? Did you have fun? You got a tan!
(She waves her hands at them)
I wish I could say I was glad to be back, but I really don't like to lie!
(The others laugh)
I mean, it's nice to see you all, and I had a fantastic time - my first vacation in ten years!- but the last night visiting my cousin, I almost hid in the closet so I wouldn't have to go home!
(The others commiserate)
Would you like to hear why?
(The others say no, but they are all laughing)
I'm gonna tell you anyhow.....I hadn't heard from my brother about my mom for the whole week I was away, but they never answer the phone, so this was not a surprise.....so, as I'm getting ready to close up my bags, I get a call......from my mother......there was a fall....
(The others nod their heads, murmurs of uh-oh)
It was not my mother who fell.....or my brother....it was ......the cat...... their nineteen year old cat!....and the cat fell into the basement, because the cat is half blind, and they tried to get to her, but there is so much junk they don't go down there anymore, and they could hear the cat calling and they were very upset of course.....and my brother went down to get the cat, and then....he slipped and he couldn't get out!
And this was....the first night I was away! Why didn't they call me? Or call someone for help? You might ask these questions.....
(They all chime in- why didn't they call for help?)
Because my brother lost his cell phone as he tried to find the cat, and my mother does not know how to use the cell phone we got her, and the cordless phone ran out of juice because it was off the charging station, and....do you want to hear more?
(They all yell 'no!')
Great, I'll tell you the rest.
The cat found a way out by jumping on my brother's head, and was able to get to my mother, who knew the cat was friendly with the neighbors, and so my mother tied a note around the cat's neck, and let the cat out, hoping for the best.....
(She pauses, the others egg her on - so what happened?)
The neighbor noticed the note, came over, helped my brother get out of the basement, went shopping for them, and listened to my mother tell how cats not only have nine lives, they helped her have another life!
And...the best part....they decided not to tell me because they were worried I would worry, and after all, there was nothing to worry about!
(She sits, then stands for a moment)
Was there?
(They laugh together, end of scene)
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* Note: A
few words about 'free' - all these monologues are protected under
copyright law and are free to read, free to perform and video as long as
no money is charged. Once you charge admission or a donation, or
include my work in an anthology, you need to contact me for royalty
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Janet S. Tiger 858-736-6315 CaregiversAnon.org
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Playwright-in-Residence
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8
1 comment:
This sounds so crazy it must be true!
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