Tuesday, August 29, 2017

Monologue Mania Day # 1293 The Future Is In the Bag by Janet S. Tiger (c) Aug. 29, 2017

Welcome to Monologue Mania- one new free* monologue a day- -and still going!
  first   year -  Feb. 13, 2014 - Feb. 12, 2015  second year -  Feb. 13, 2015 - Feb. 12, 2016  third year -  Feb. 13, 2016 -  today!                 
I've continued with a monologue a day until the spirit moves me to stop - if you have any ideas for a monologue you want me to write, please let me know at tigerteam1@gmail.com.
If you just started this blog and want to read the earlier monologues- for a list of the titles and blurbs from each                                                                                                                    day, click here  There are now over 1260!
Get  more great award-winning monologues - MonologueZone.com
 If you'd like to write your own monologues, I happen to have a book for that -   
Thank you for your comments - and for liking and sharing this site.  Wishing you much success!
- ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
Monologue Mania Day # 1293 The Future Is In the Bag by Janet S. Tiger (c) Aug. 29, 2017             

                                    The Future Is In the Bag 
                                               by Janet S. Tiger  (c) 2017 all rights reserved 

        (A person comes out, holding something furtively beneath the clothing)


I love plastic!  The smell!  The touch!  The inability to decompose!  All so amazing!

It is almost..dare I say it?....almost....(hisses)......sexual!

Oh, don't look so surprised!  You chose to be here tonight!  You are just as excited as I am!
As we all are!  Our favorite movie is...The Graduate!  Say it with me.....

        (Encourages the audience to join in)

Plastic....plastic.....(louder) PLASTIC....PLASTIC!   

        (Puts finger to mouth)

Shhh.....not too loud.....

That is why this is an underground club.....it's dangerous, it's titillating.....it's illegal!....but 
we have access to plastic!  That's right!  Plastic that is now unavailable anywhere
on the planet.....as we all know, the obsession with stripping the planet of plastic took hold 
in the early 2000s - rising to fevered pitch with the election of President Gore, the first 
President ever elected who was over the age of 110!  They made jokes....he was the plastic president!  
But actually, he was the ANTI-plastic president....

His laws prohibiting first manufacture, then ownership!  of plastic bags made us illegals- outlaws -
criminals!     PBJ - Plastic bag juveniles they were called..... young people raised from birth to hate
 plastic!  The horrifying and completely without sympathy.... bag police -

They destroyed laboratories experimenting with ways of emulsifying the plastic into fertilizer...
making it biodegradable.....and so.....the plastic we have here....is very special.  Very rare.....

It is, like all things almost sexual..........sacred!

You were invited to join us for the ceremony where we place just washed fruits and vegetables into 
plastic bags, and watch how the bags  - HOLD IN THE WETNESS!  A miracle!  No dripping....

Oh, the joy!  The wonder!  The utter immorality of....plastic.......in all its glory....

            (Puts hands up to the heavens)

And now....we will pray.......

            (Lights down on a very strange new world)


Please note - This is not in defense of plastic- just wondering about its future - Kenya just became the most recent country to ban plastic bags, joining several others - for more info, please click here
Note: A few words about 'free' -  all these monologues are protected under copyright law and are free to read, free to perform and video as long as no money is charged. Once you charge admission or a donation, or include my work in an anthology, you need to contact me for royalty 
Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315                CaregiversAnon.org
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8

1 comment:

Miriam said...

Where do these ideas come from, Janet Tiger? You really amaze me! And by the way, when I read PBJ, I laughed out loud. I rarely do that when reading. Well done.