Friday, January 16, 2015

Monologue Mania Day# 338 by Janet S. Tiger The New Guest Jan. 16, 2015

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Monologue Mania Day# 338 by Janet S. Tiger The New Guest Jan. 16, 2015
                                       The New Guest
                                                ©Janet S. Tiger all rights reserved 2015

              (A woman is seated on a chair, listening, fiddling with her hearing aid.  She hears something, jumps up.)

Oh, I get to be first.....well, that's interesting....hello, I am new here tonight!  I'm a guest of Lorraine's, not an actor or a writer, just a guest, but I want to thank you for letting me come......

              (She takes off her scarf, puts it neatly on the chair, hears something.)

Oh, my name!  My name is Edna Mae Bannister, you know, like the bannister....(a little nervous)  I hope Lorraine didn't tell you what they used to say about my name, you could probably figure it out...Edna Mae Bannister, for a good ride!  That's when we were kids, but these things just stick like glue.....

               (She slips out of her shoes)

We've known each other forever, but I've never had time to come to these meetings, I guess I was a little nervous......

                (She removes her sweater, places it on the chair)

Of course, I was a go-go-dancer in the 60s so I'm not embarrassed about things like this....but I am 82, and I don't look like I did then.....

                 (She swivels her head around the room)

But then again, I guess all the people here understand that!  (Deep sigh)  I always wanted to get involved in theater, but my kids were into sports, and now the grandchildren are into sports, so, I never had the time until now, and this is such an unusual group.....maybe one time I'll get the courage to read, and not just listen! know this is my first time at a reading like this, I guess I'm a little nervous........

                 (She starts to take off her blouse, hears someone shout)

You don't have to yell!  (Listens)  What?  Hold on....

                 (She adjusts her hearing aid)

That's better?  What did you say?  

                  (Tilts her head to listen, turns to glare at someone)

Lorraine!  Oh, I know you think this is funny!  I hope you just wet your pants laughing!  

                  (Turns back to the crowd)

Yes, Lorraine told me that we all take off our clothes to listen to the new play, so that if the play is, well, not so interesting, okay, if it's boring, we all have something to look at..... to stay awake!


But the name, I thought with the name Stripteasers......

                 (Adjusts her hearing aid)

SCRIPT - TEASERS!   Oh, I get it!  So I don't have to get naked to hear this play?  Oh, thank goodness!  (Realizes what she's said)  I mean, not that I wouldn't to see everyone in the....I mean, maybe.....uh......excuse me....

                  (Turns to leave, looks back)

I need to go to the bathroom now, this thong is riding up my.....

                  (She hears the screams to stop, shakes her head and leaves.  Welcome to the Scripteasers, new guests, and yes, you may keep your clothing on!)

Tonight is the reading of a few of this year's blog of monologues at Scripteasers - a wonderful group which I have been privileged to be a member of for over 33 years.  They read my first work - which lasted for days! - and produced my first one-act, SCRIPTEASE, along with literally dozens of my plays over the years.  What I have learned at Scripteasers has enabled to write work that has been seen all over the world - but it always Scripteasers.  Thank you.  See you tonight!


Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8

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