Tuesday, May 29, 2018

Monologue Mania Day # 1565 Hate Crimes by Janet S. Tiger (c) May 30, 2018

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Monologue Mania Day # 1565 Hate Crimes by Janet S. Tiger (c) May 30, 2018           
                          Alert - strong language and themes

                                  Hate Crimes 
                                                        A one-act 
                                                     By Janet S. Tiger
                                                       © Jan. 27, 2018


In order of appearance

Bryan -  20s
Father – 50s

Setting -  Living room                                     

(Young man enters, he is angry.  This is Bryan, and he looks at his father, sitting in an easy chair, reading.)

BRYAN-  I hate Jews!

         (The father looks up, shrugs and goes back to his paper)

BRYAN -  Didja hear me?  I said that I hate Jews!

FATHER- So?  I hate Jews, big deal.. I hate a lotta people, and I'm glad to see you do,
too.  I stopped all that polical correctness shit in you kids, except for your brother, who decided he wanted to be a fairy, but you can't win 'em all. Five outta six winners, can't complain.

BRYAN -  From the first day I remember you tellin' me stuff, I knew Jews were the
enemy, and they were the worst, because the others didn't have money like the Jews, and the Jews used all their money to keep us down.

FATHER -  Ok, you got it, what's eatin' your ass now...

BRYAN -  You know that girl I been hangin' out with, Christie?

FATHER -  The pretty one with the big tits.....?

BRYAN -  Dad!  That's my...my girl...

FATHER -  I know.  And if she had little tits she wouldn't be your girls, so I ask again,
what's eatin' you?

BRYAN -  Her father is big into family....before we get, you know married or have a

FATHER -  You better get married first, I don't want no bastards around here.....(thinks)              Wait a minute, is she knocked up?  Is that what this is about?  Is it yours?

BRYAN -  (Getting madder)  No!

FATHER -  Not yours?  Then just fuck her and let someone else take care of it....

BRYAN -  I mean, no, she's not pregnant!

FATHER -  Then what the hell do you want from me?

BRYAN -  The truth.

FATHER -  (Getting irritated)  I always tell the truth, even if people don't like it....I tell the
truth always....

BRYAN -  So how do you figure this?

           (He waves some papers, his father takes them)

FATHER -  What is this?  Ancestry.com?  What the....

BRYAN -  Christie, she saw this ad on TV.....

FATHER -  -(Waves this aside)  That girl watches too much TV, she told me her favorite
show was (derogatory)  the Bachelor!  Not too bright, and when those tits start to sag....

BRYAN - Shut up!  ((Breathes heavy)  She wanted to know who I was, what our family

FATHER -  So what?

BRYAN -  So she sent some of my DNA in...

FATHER -  Jesus, and you didn't know?  Now that's stupid....spendin' good money on
crap like that....

BRYAN -  These are the results, Dad.....

        (He points to something on the pages)

BRYAN -  There, read that!

FATHER -  Eastern European ancestry......so what?

BRYAN -  Do you know what that means?

FATHER -  Some of our ancestors were Pollacks, again, who cares, it probably means
you could have some dumb babies.....

BRYAN -  Incredible!  Boy this harder than I thought.....when she saw that, she made
me get tested for all these diseases, and you know what came up?

FATHER -  Cabbage and potatoes and vodka?

BRYAN -  Tay Sachs

FATHER -  Is it tasty?

BRYAN - (Scornful) It's a disease....you idiot...

          (His father smacks his son across the face, but the boy doesn't flinch)

BRYAN -  It's a bad disease, kind of like it kills your baby.....

FATHER -  So, don't have babies, get a yellow one from China....

BRYAN -  It's a disease  (reading)...primarily found ...in Ashkenazi Jews.....

         (His father sits heavily)

BRYAN -  No punch?  No reaction at all?  Do you know what that means, Dad?  It's
from the patrilineal side - that means you, Dad!  That's means... there's a Jew in the woodpile!

         (His father now jumps up and rips the papers)

BRYAN -  That's really smart, I guess the Polish part landed in you, right?

         (His father moves to smack him again and he ducks this tim)

BRYAN -  It's just a copy, we have the originals.....did you know?  Or did you suspect
that all along because you love money so much!

FATHER -  Shut up and get the hell outta here!  I don't have to listen to this shit!

BRYAN -  Shit?  I don't think so, Dad.....why would I make this up?  I mean, what this
means is......I hate ......me......

           (His father turns away, and is trying to get a hold of himself)

FATHER -  Your grandfather, on your mother’s side, he ….once told me he escaped
from Russia, back at the turn of the last century…..something called a….pogrom….But he was senile, no one listened to him…..especially not my father……

BRYAN -  So it’s true…..

FATHER -  I don’t know…..and I don’t wanna know!  I don’t wanna listen to this!

          (He shakes his head)

BRYAN -  But you hafta listen…..unless I was adopted, I’m part Jew…..how can I hate,
part of me……

FATHER -  Just focus on hating…..me….

             (He slumps and his son goes to him, touches his shoulder)

BRYAN -  Look Dad, I didn’t know what to think, but maybe, we can kinda, learn about
this …together?

FATHER -  Okay……

BRYAN -  Maybe we could even go to synagogue sometime?

              (His father hugs him, and turns to leave)

FATHER -  Look, I’m gonna get a beer, want one?  I mean, do Jews drink beer? 

BRYAN -  Yeah, I guess they do!

              (His father exits, and Bryan watches, then turns to the audience)

BRYAN -  And that’s exactly how it went…..in my brain….the truth is, my father beat the
crap outta me – I still have a scar here…..

            (Points to his forehead)

BRYAN -  And I haven’t seen my father in four years…..and I broke up with Christie,
because she didn’t wanna marry a Jew, let alone one with a marker for a disease!  And my brothers and sisters don’t talk to me….and I don’t get it, I mean, they have Jewish blood, too?  Right?

So here I am, rabbi, ready to learn….but first, just one question…..how do I stop hating….myself?

              (Blackout.  The end.)

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Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315                CaregiversAnon.org
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983


Swedenborg Hall 2006-8

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