first year - Feb. 13, 2014 - Feb. 12, 2015 second year - Feb. 13, 2015 - Feb. 12, 2016 third year - Feb. 13, 2016 - today!
I've continued with a monologue a day until the spirit moves me to stop - if you have any ideas for a monologue you want me to write, please let me know at tigerteam1@gmail.com.
I've continued with a monologue a day until the spirit moves me to stop - if you have any ideas for a monologue you want me to write, please let me know at tigerteam1@gmail.com.
If you just started this blog and want to read the earlier monologues- for a list of the titles and blurbs from each day, click here There are now over 1150!
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If you'd like to write your own monologues, I happen to have a book for that -
Thank you for your comments - and for liking and sharing this site. Wishing you much success!
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Monologue Mania Day # 1155 Phony Calls by Janet S. Tiger (c) April 12 , 2017
Phony Calls
by Janet S. Tiger (c) 2017 all rights reserved
tigerteam1@gmail.com
(Two women stand at opposite sides of the stage. During the course of the scene,
they will both change some clothing, hair and glasses to signify passing of time. There will also
be a calendar on the wall. The first woman is Abby - she picks up the phone and dials, the second
is Bertha who picks up the phone to answer)
ABBY - Hi, Bertha.
BERTHA - Hi, Abby.
ABBY - How are you doing?
BERTHA - I'm fine, how are you?
ABBY - Good. How's school?
BERTHA- Good, how're the kids?
ABBY - Getting bigger every day.
BERTHA - Bye
ABBY - Bye
(They hang up and Bertha dials this time)
ABBY - Hi, Bertha.
BERTHA - Hi, Abby.
ABBY - How are you doing?
BERTHA - I'm fine, how are you?
ABBY - Good. How's school?
BERTHA- Good, how're the kids?
ABBY - Getting bigger every day.
BERTHA - Bye
ABBY - Bye
(They hang up and they dial together, faster this time)
ABBY - Hi, Bertha.
BERTHA - Hi, Abby.
ABBY - How are you doing?
BERTHA - I'm fine, how are you?
ABBY - Good. How's school?
BERTHA- Good, how're the kids?
ABBY - Getting bigger every day.
BERTHA - Bye
ABBY - Bye
(When they hang up, Abby goes and pulls a page off the calendar. She then calls Bertha, but uses
a pushbutton phone now)
ABBY - Hi, Bertha.
BERTHA - Hi, Abby.
ABBY - How are you doing?
BERTHA - I'm fine, how are you?
ABBY - Good. How's your mom?
BERTHA- Good, How's your kids?
ABBY - Fine. Good talking to you.
BERTHA - Good talking to you. Bye
ABBY - Bye
(They hang up and Bertha dials this time)
they will both change some clothing, hair and glasses to signify passing of time. There will also
be a calendar on the wall. The first woman is Abby - she picks up the phone and dials, the second
is Bertha who picks up the phone to answer)
ABBY - Hi, Bertha.
BERTHA - Hi, Abby.
ABBY - How are you doing?
BERTHA - I'm fine, how are you?
ABBY - Good. How's school?
BERTHA- Good, how're the kids?
ABBY - Getting bigger every day.
BERTHA - Bye
ABBY - Bye
(They hang up and Bertha dials this time)
ABBY - Hi, Bertha.
BERTHA - Hi, Abby.
ABBY - How are you doing?
BERTHA - I'm fine, how are you?
ABBY - Good. How's school?
BERTHA- Good, how're the kids?
ABBY - Getting bigger every day.
BERTHA - Bye
ABBY - Bye
(They hang up and they dial together, faster this time)
ABBY - Hi, Bertha.
BERTHA - Hi, Abby.
ABBY - How are you doing?
BERTHA - I'm fine, how are you?
ABBY - Good. How's school?
BERTHA- Good, how're the kids?
ABBY - Getting bigger every day.
BERTHA - Bye
ABBY - Bye
(When they hang up, Abby goes and pulls a page off the calendar. She then calls Bertha, but uses
a pushbutton phone now)
ABBY - Hi, Bertha.
BERTHA - Hi, Abby.
ABBY - How are you doing?
BERTHA - I'm fine, how are you?
ABBY - Good. How's your mom?
BERTHA- Good, How's your kids?
ABBY - Fine. Good talking to you.
BERTHA - Good talking to you. Bye
ABBY - Bye
(They hang up and Bertha dials this time)
ABBY - Hi, Bertha.
BERTHA - Hi, Abby.
ABBY - How are you doing?
BERTHA - I'm fine, how are you?
ABBY - Good. How's your mom?
BERTHA- Good, How's your kids?
ABBY - Fine. Good talking to you.
BERTHA - Good talking to you. Bye
ABBY - Bye
(They hang up and they dial together, faster this time)
ABBY - Hi, Bertha.
BERTHA - Hi, Abby.
ABBY - How are you doing?
BERTHA - I'm fine, how are you?
ABBY - Good. How's your mom?
BERTHA- Good, How's your kids?
ABBY - Fine. Good talking to you.
BERTHA - Good talking to you. Bye
ABBY - Bye
BERTHA - Hi, Abby.
ABBY - How are you doing?
BERTHA - I'm fine, how are you?
ABBY - Good. How's your mom?
BERTHA- Good, How's your kids?
ABBY - Fine. Good talking to you.
BERTHA - Good talking to you. Bye
ABBY - Bye
(When they hang up, Abby goes and pulls another page off the calendar. She then calls Bertha,
but uses a cell phone now, much faster)
ABBY - Hi, Bertha.
BERTHA - Hi, Abby.
ABBY - How are you doing?
BERTHA - I'm fine, how are you?
ABBY - Good. How's your mom?
BERTHA- Good, How's your kids?
ABBY - Fine. Good talking to you.
BERTHA - Good talking to you. Bye
ABBY - Bye....
(Now when they hang up, Bertha goes and pulls another page off the calendar, then a few more pages.
She then calls Abby, slowing down)
BERTHA - Hi, Abby.
ABBY - Hi, Bertha.
ABBY - How are you doing?
BERTHA - I'm fine, how are you?
ABBY - Good. Good talking to you.
BERTHA - Good talking to you. Bye
ABBY - Bye....
(They hang up slowly and now Abby calls)
ABBY - Bertha, before you say anything, there's something I've wanted to say to you for a long time.
We've been friends for 45 years, and I just wanted to tell you that it always annoyed
me that you went out with that guy I liked in junior high, and you took him away from me,
and then there was that guy I liked in high school, and you stole him away from me
but the most annoying thing was..... you had an affair with my husband.....and I just wish you'd taken
him, too.....
(She looks at the phone, while Bertha just stands, not answering)
ABBY - Bertha? Bertha? Wait, there's a message.....
(She gets her glasses and squints)
ABBY - Oh, Bertha died.
(She turns to leave, stops, looks back)
ABBY - At least they sent a text......oh, wait....I think there's a message, too.....
(She pushes a button and we hear...)
BERTHA - Hi, how are you? Are you ok? I'm fine. Call me later. Bye.
(She pushes the button again, walks off listening)
BERTHA - Hi, how are you? Are you ok? I'm fine. Call me later. Bye.
BERTHA - Hi, how are you? Are you ok? I'm fine. Call me later. Bye.
(She suddenly turns back and goes over, hugs Bertha and removes all the pages from the calendar.
Exits to...)
BERTHA - Hi, how are you? Are you ok? I'm fine. Call me later. Bye.......
(Lights down. The end)
but uses a cell phone now, much faster)
ABBY - Hi, Bertha.
BERTHA - Hi, Abby.
ABBY - How are you doing?
BERTHA - I'm fine, how are you?
ABBY - Good. How's your mom?
BERTHA- Good, How's your kids?
ABBY - Fine. Good talking to you.
BERTHA - Good talking to you. Bye
ABBY - Bye....
(Now when they hang up, Bertha goes and pulls another page off the calendar, then a few more pages.
She then calls Abby, slowing down)
BERTHA - Hi, Abby.
ABBY - Hi, Bertha.
ABBY - How are you doing?
BERTHA - I'm fine, how are you?
ABBY - Good. Good talking to you.
BERTHA - Good talking to you. Bye
ABBY - Bye....
(They hang up slowly and now Abby calls)
ABBY - Bertha, before you say anything, there's something I've wanted to say to you for a long time.
We've been friends for 45 years, and I just wanted to tell you that it always annoyed
me that you went out with that guy I liked in junior high, and you took him away from me,
and then there was that guy I liked in high school, and you stole him away from me
but the most annoying thing was..... you had an affair with my husband.....and I just wish you'd taken
him, too.....
(She looks at the phone, while Bertha just stands, not answering)
ABBY - Bertha? Bertha? Wait, there's a message.....
(She gets her glasses and squints)
ABBY - Oh, Bertha died.
(She turns to leave, stops, looks back)
ABBY - At least they sent a text......oh, wait....I think there's a message, too.....
(She pushes a button and we hear...)
BERTHA - Hi, how are you? Are you ok? I'm fine. Call me later. Bye.
(She pushes the button again, walks off listening)
BERTHA - Hi, how are you? Are you ok? I'm fine. Call me later. Bye.
BERTHA - Hi, how are you? Are you ok? I'm fine. Call me later. Bye.
(She suddenly turns back and goes over, hugs Bertha and removes all the pages from the calendar.
Exits to...)
BERTHA - Hi, how are you? Are you ok? I'm fine. Call me later. Bye.......
(Lights down. The end)
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* Note: A few words about 'free' - all these monologues are protected under copyright law and are free to read, free to perform and video as long as no money is charged. Once you charge admission or a donation, or include my work in an anthology, you need to contact me for royalty
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Janet S. Tiger 858-736-6315 CaregiversAnon.org
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Playwright-in-Residence
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8
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