I've continued with a monologue a day until the spirit moves me to stop, so if you have any ideas for a monologue you want me to write, please let me know at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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by Janet S. Tiger (c) all rights reserved (c) 2017
(Not sure where this scene will go, but it will start something like this)
JEANNIE - I think this group has given the wrong impression...
GEORGE - That has been known to happen!
ANN - I think you're right, perhaps our demeanor is too light-hearted....
CLARK - It's just too low-brow.....we need to show that we have....
ALL TOGETHER - CLASS!
(At this, one of the group brings out a boom box, or speaker)
JEANNIE - And what is the symbol of true and utter ....class?
FRANKLIN - Everyone knows it has to be......(great flourish) the opera!
(At this Ann and Jeannie turn around, and while the music is turned on, they will don headdresses. The music begins, it is ....the Ride of the Valkyrie! The two women turn around, they are wearing...bedpans with horns. They run around the stage and then face each other in a duel of words)
JEANNIE - I am exhausted! I am exhausted! I am exhausted!
ANN - I am so worried! I am so worried! I am so worried!
(The others sing - 'They are so tired, They are so worried!' Someone stops the music)
JEANNIE - I am so tired!
ANN - I am so worried!
JEANNIE - I AM SO TIRED!
ANN - I AM SO WORRIED!
JEANNIE - Well, I am so tired AND worried!
GEORGE - What a surprise!
(Savannah is stunned by this, and Clark goes over to her, looks)
CLARK - I guess she's not an opera fan. My dear, that is our group's rendition of RIDE OF THE CAREGIVERS, with apologies to Wagner.......Nate hated the opera......anyone here remember my Nate?
GEORGE- (under his breath) He was a good man...any man who hates opera is a good man.....
CLARK - I heard that.....well, that little song was his gift to me....before he died....funny thing, I'm the one with the HIV, twenty years now.....he was the healthy one....big healthy stupid man....just had to go up on that ladder, because God forbid!.... he did not want to ever appear like a sissy, even though he was 67 years old, and even though we HAD the money to hire some nice-lookin’ young man in tight shorts to climb up on the roof......(sings) it had to be him!.......(back to himself).....he just hadta go up the top rung to make sure our gutters were clean!
dies.....and he falls off the ladder and breaks his hip....which wouldn't
matter if he had stayed dead, but noooooo, the paramedics jumpstarted him and
kept him going, and then I kept him goin.....another six
years...... the delights of decubitus! (turns to Savannah) In case you don’t know, that’s bedsores! on his
back and then there were the shots, and bathroom and showers and everyone here
knows what I'm talkin' about..........because he was nevah outta that
wheelchair after the fall......
and even though it has not been a picnic havin HIV,,,,,(shudders) Takin care of someone....now that was brutal! To be totally honest, I have no idea how I woulda survived those years without alla you.......even if I am the only person here who can make a decent cuppa coffee!
(The others jeer and he smiles)
(The others laugh and applaud as he sits)