Saturday, October 8, 2016

Monologue Mania Day #969 In the Same Boat (for Caregivers Anonymous) by Janet S. Tiger (c) Oct. 8, 2016

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Monologue Mania Day #969 In the Same Boat (for Caregivers Anonymous) by Janet S. Tiger (c) Oct. 8,  2016

                                       In the Same Boat
                                               (for Caregivers Anonymous)
                                             by Janet S. Tiger   
                                     c)  2016    all rights reserved

        (The woman standing is well dressed, perfectly put together.  But she is playing with her fingers, nervously at first, then she deliberately puts them behind her back.)

I listen to all our stories and I think to myself, why do I come here?  After all, I'm not really attending to my parents, I have full time help for them.

Around the clock.

Not cheap, but I run a company with employees on three penguins yet, but we're working on it.....

         (The others laugh)

(Sighs)  I have a personal assistant and I do not have to worry....but.....

         (She hears the others go shout 'BUT!'....and she smiles)

But I suppose sometimes, it gets to me a little, like this morning, when I had a conference call with the board, and I had to have a nice quiet moment before we deal with multi-millions of dollars.....and I get the call.....

        (The others chime in with ideas - someone got sick, someone is refusing to eat, somebody forgot their Depends....etc  she waves them off)

I guess the fall is obvious......father down!

And the new helper, who was supposed to be trained and experienced and with a lot of empathy.....

       (She signals the rest, they join her)

No show!

And my personal assistant of 12 years is unable to come in because SHE has an emergency with her grandchild!  So I am without my assistant....who would normally fix this....and the agency is unable to get someone to replace thee person and so now I have to replace the agency because this is why I have an agency that I pay twice what I would pay someone I would have to check on myself!  And so now I have to be involved with the hospital and the list of meds and all the things and the conference call is NOW and everything is

        (She covers her face and shakes her head)

So here I am with people waiting on me and my mother turns to me and says......'Well, you wanted to be a big businesswoman'......and I start laughing, and I can't stop!  I get hysterical and luckily a nurse takes me aside and gives me something and it calms me down.

But tonight, here, I know what I always know when I come here......I don't know anything.  I have no control....and that is what makes it so hard.  I think as the head of this big multinational organization that I have control, when I am no different from anyone in this room who has to get pills ready, and prepare for an emergency visit to the emergency room.

We are all in the same boat......

        (She goes to sit down)

And it always feels like it's about to sink!

         (Scene with the others pulling out the wheelchair, and they put her in, attaching cardboard sides that look like a boat, and they use crutches for oars and move around the stage, singing,
'Row, row, row your boat
Gently down the stream
Merrily, merrily merrily merrily
Life is but a scream!)

Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315      
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8

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