Monday, April 25, 2016

Monologue Mania Day #803 The Joy of Sox (revised) by Janet S. Tiger (c) Apr. 25, 2016

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Monologue Mania Day #803 The Joy of Sox (revised) by Janet S. Tiger (c) Apr. 25,  2016 

This was first posted Apr. 19, 2014 Day #66 (also there, because at the time it was true! -Only 299 days to go!)

                        The Joy of Sox                                
                                        by Janet S. Tiger 
                           © 2014 all rights

            (A man comes out onstage, he has a very big bag of….socks.  Which he opens up, and      dumps  on the ground, stares at audience in hostility.)

I know that nowadays, everybody has a fascination with things that, when I was younger, were never discussed in public.

These private functions were discussed behind barns and in closets where they belonged, with snickers and giggles, because the images were funny….and never, ever referred to in front of…(whispers)  the children.

But now, things are ….different.

Which is why I like to return to the simple things in life – the joy….of socks.

Let me explain why I can discuss this publicly.

Here is a pair of socks.  

            (He holds it up to illustrate)

They are happy, perfectly matched.  Watch as they are mated together, to be kept in a warm, happy drawer until they make someone’s feet very cozy…

            (He takes the two socks and puts them together, opening the top of one pair and enclosing             the other, suggestively) nice!  So ....warm......and when I put them in a drawer like this, I can think all day about them......enveloped in each other's love......

            (He hugs the socks, puts them lovingly back in the bag, then looks in)

Now see these socks……

            (He picks up a sock with a hole in it.)

How could this bring joy?

Because if you look at this sock, you see the years of faithful service…..and.....judging by the size of the hole, many years!  

            (He pokes his fingers through the hole, wiggles them around, suggestively)

And notice how smooth the material has become, how gentle against the skin.

            (He rubs the sock against his face, smiling)

And look at all these socks…..

            (He now gets animated, sits down and starts putting on a new pair of socks, smiling.)

Some are matched, but others have lost their partners, they are the wild ones!  Always a new love......and it certainly doesn’t matter to my feet!

            (He picks up the others, holding them to his chest.)

They are all different styles and colors, yet they do not fight!  They do not start wars, they do not argue over who did not put the toilet seat down!  They are happy!  They are content to make others happy!  They are…….perfect!

            (He pours the socks over his head, shivering in ecstasy, rolling in them.)  

(Going wild)  I love them all!  Why can’t anyone understand this?  They don’t argue with me, or ask to borrow the car?  Or want to marry drunks!  They hurt no one, and they only give joy! And that is why, I cannot….no…I will not!..... discard these socks.   And if my wife wishes me to do that, she should be coming here to see a therapist, not me!

            (He gathers the socks, and puts them lovingly back in the bag, starts to leave.)

You’ll have to excuse me….I think I need to go change….my socks.

            (He exits, tiptoeing.  The end)

Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8

Note: A few words about 'free' -  all these monologues are protected under copyright law and are free to read, free to perform and video as long as no money is charged. Once you charge admission or a donation, or include my work in an anthology, you need to contact me for royalty info.  

1 comment:

Jennifer Silva Redmond said...

Strange...but he feels real.