Monday, December 12, 2016

Monologue Mania Day #1034 When I Was A We by Janet S. Tiger (c) Dec. 12, 2016

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Monologue Mania Day #1034 by Janet S. Tiger (c) Dec. 12, 2016
                             When I Was a We
                                            (For Caregivers Anonymous)
                                 A monologue by Janet S. Tiger (c) Dec, 2014   all rights reserved     
               (This is the same woman from Day # 310,  The Devil in the Donut Shop.  She is smiling, eating, what else? a glazed donut.  Her Southern accent is still evident.)

I just love these things.  I don't care if my hips are now the size of a small hippo, the only men who look at women my age are construction workers, tryin' to figure how big a remodel job I'm good what the hell?

For alla you here for awhile, you know I've been coming to these meetin's since, well, since the beginnin' and that was an age ago.  And I am the one responsible for several members here, Sue, being one here tonight.....

            (She points at Sue who giggles)

Since my husband passed on five years ago, I only come for the Christmas party, so I can help Sue with the donuts......

            (She waves the donut in the air)

And I think we can thank Sue again for these.....

            (She gets the crowd to clap and cheer, Sue is embarrassed but smiling)

I just wanted to say somethin' I've been thinkin' about for awhile now, maybe it will be of some help to those here who are new......

           (She nods to the new girl, who looks down)

When I was born, it was all....I. I....I  ....I need.....I need a bottle, I need someone to hold me,  for God sakes, I need a new diaper!  Then comes the 'I'of I want....I want something else to play with, I want that new doll, I want that donut!  I want five more minutes with you, mother.....I....I....I....

And then, somethin' happens, and you join a team, and suddenly you learn about.... we.  Not the we of no choice-family, but the 'we' of choice.....We are goin' to work hard, we are goin' to win!....(Sad)  We didn't win....(Determined)  ...We are gonna work harder.......We work harder.....(Happy)  We win!

So it goes, you meet someone like I did, in high school, and you marry him, and you become the ultimate 'we' - a couple.  A couple of nuts, we were, or two peas in a pod......we....wehad children, we raised a family.....we lost one of the kids, that almost stopped us from bein' a we, but when we got through it, nothin' could stop us.....we.....we....we....all the way home.....

But then, he died.  Not suddenly as you all know, it took a few years of heart attacks, and nursin' and comin' here to stay sane......but then he was....gone home to the Lord.

How do you stop bein' a we?  Especially after all those years together.  I even said 'we' for a long time after he died, oh, we'll come for dinner.  We'll bring the dessert......we always did, when I was a 'we'.....But I wasn't a we anymore.  I was alone.  And I......I am alone kids visit, but, it is I again, and yet, it does not feel like the I when I was little.  So who am I?  So long a we, that being just an 'I' is not even understandable. 

One day I woke up and realized, I cannot return to I because that is the past.  But since I am no longer a we........I have to  Just like that silly does it go?  I've gotta be me.  I am me.

So that is who I am now.  Me.  And I guess it's always what I've been, just needed a bit a time to figure it out.

          (She goes to sit down, stops, looks at the new girl)

The real question you have to ask yourself now.......who are you?

          (Lights dim)

Originally posted  Day #317  When I Was a We  Dec. 26, 2014 (c) all rights reserved

Note: A few words about 'free' -  all these monologues are protected under copyright law and are free to read, free to perform and video as long as no money is charged. Once you charge admission or a donation, or include my work in an anthology, you need to contact me for royalty 
Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315      
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983

Swedenborg Hall 2006-8

1 comment:

Jennifer Silva Redmond said...

You gotta be you! And I'm glad.