Friday, November 18, 2016

Monologue Mania Day #1010 Answers to Songs by Janet S. Tiger (c) Nov. 18, 2016

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Monologue Mania Day #1010 Answers to Songs by Janet S. Tiger (c) Nov. 18, 2016
   This might be about the election, too, and with a lot of music in it

                                          Answers to Songs
                               A monologue by Janet S. Tiger   © all rights reserved

             (Woman enters talking on phone)

What do these songs mean anyhow?  Walking on broken glass?  I mean who would be stupid enough to walk on broken glass?  And what about -Would I lie to you?' - of course I would!  And let's not even ask - 'Will you remember me?'  The answer, a giant - NO! I don't give a damn about you!

And I Will Survive - no, you will not!

Where Did Our Love Go?  In the toilet, you idiot!  Right in the crapper!

And how about....I Got You Babe?  No you don' are divorced, and if that wasn't enough, you skiied into some damn tree!

It's Your Thing.....No it ain't!  If it was, you wouldn't have to sing about it.....

And The Girl Can't Help It....well she'd better or else she's gonna be put away in a cell!

We've Only Just Begun......nah, you are gone!  Finished like the grains of bread you didn't eat!

And Sweet Home Alabama - nobody's who's been there in the summer would say that!  Hotter'n hell, yeah, but not sweet!

Tiny Dancer - Ha!  I saw that bitch dancing, and she had bat wings at 28!  Do Ya Think I'm Sexy?  Na.......


Of course I'm ranting!  It's what I do best!  Because I'm jealous of all the kids alive today who do not have to listen for 20 hours to hear the words!  But you didn't let me tell my favorite -  Candle in the Wind!  Now there is a song about NOTHING!  Because no candle stays on in wind, so if you live your life like a candle in the wind - you are living for nothing!  Because no candle can stay lit in the wind - get it?  Good!

         (Takes a deep breath, turns to leave, stops, looks back)

I feel better now.  If only......I could just make the whole election disappear, too......Maybe it's just like ..... walking on the sun.....

         (She goes humming off)
Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315      
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8

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