Monday, July 18, 2016

Monologue Mania Day #887 On Line Friends by Janet S. Tiger (c) July 18, 2016

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Monologue Mania Day #887 by Janet S. Tiger (c) July 18,  2016

                                                   On Line Friends
                                            A monologue by Janet S. Tiger   
                                                © all rights reserved    2016                                                                                                                         

          (Woman enters with a shopping basket over her arm, a bag in the other.  She looks around calculating, then steps up and smiles)

Hi!  I pick this one!  I think this is the shortest line!  I know the checker, she goes fast, and you only have a few things - I saw you when I was walking around.......but, wait, do you have an out-of-state check or something weird?

         (Listens, smiles)

Good!  You didn't look the type!  I once let a woman in front of me because all she had was a soda, and she had some strange traveler's check and it took 10 minutes!  And then, when I told her it was not nice, she said to me...'but you said you weren't in a hurry!'

Oh, no, I don't want to cut in front of you!  I was just sharing a story because it looks like.....

         (She stares in front, shaking head)

Price check!  Oh, I just hate the computer stuff.....all that technology and we still have to wait while some poor boxboy has to run back and look for an item on a shelf that probably is a blank space and will take him 10 minutes to find!  And then it will be the wrong item!

        (Laughs, listens, changes a bit)

And of course there's always the possibility of him finding a naked man back there.....looking for his pants because someone took them! It's been known to happen, and I think it would make a fascinating story, don't you?  Boxboy bags a bare body!  (Smirks)  Now wouldn't it be really funny if I got in line behind the person who was in the storage area with him?

       (She opens the bag, smiles, listens, moves in front of the other person)

Thank you!  I appreciate going in front of you, and you paying and all!  It's so nice to make a new friend! .....

        (Turns to leave, stops, looks back)

You are right.....I do shop here a lot......and  even though I hate computers......I have a lot of ....'on line' friends!

       (She exits to more 'special deals')
Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8

Note: A few words about 'free' -  all these monologues are protected under copyright law and are free to read, free to perform and video as long as no money is charged. Once you charge admission or a donation, or include my work in an anthology, you need to contact me for royalty info.