Welcome to Monologue Mania- one new free* monologue a day- -and still going!
first year - Feb. 13, 2014 - Feb. 12, 2015 second year - Feb. 13, 2015 - Feb. 12, 2016 third year - Feb. 13, 2016 - today!
I've continued with a monologue a day until the spirit moves me to stop - if you have any ideas for a monologue you want me to write, please let me know at tigerteam1@gmail.com.
I've continued with a monologue a day until the spirit moves me to stop - if you have any ideas for a monologue you want me to write, please let me know at tigerteam1@gmail.com.
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Monologue Mania Day # 1177 One Word by Janet S. Tiger (c) May 5, 2017
One Word
©Janet S. Tiger 2017 all rights reserved
tigerteam1@gmail.com
(The director comes out - very irritated, a little blurry)
(Getting a little wild-eyed)
One word that was all ......it was one word..... silly you might say. Well, the word was not silly but the word was silly...I mean the word was a silly word ....I guess actually every word can be silly if put into the correct location. Sometimes in rehearsals, I get the actors to think about -what if it was a different word the writer put here. But then the writer came to rehearsal.
Don't get me wrong, I don't mind the writer at rehearsals.... well, not too much .....well, maybe not at all..... actually, it's much better when they stay away .....I mean, it may be their play but it's kind of like sending your child to school. You have to let your child go and you have to let them learn that it's a big world out there and the audience doesn't always like your play.... I mean the audience doesn't like your play the way you wrote it.....
I mean..... not all the students like your child......sometimes, not even the teacher likes your kid....and sometimes there's a bully otherwise known as a critic and that your kid has to get a thick skin to get through kindergarten ......and the theater.
And that is the purpose of a cast and a director .......
So we have the chance to fix the play .....which is hopefully what the playwright wants.....but this is not necessarily the case because just like the parent with the child who is perfect, the playwright can only say that every word I wrote is perfect!!
So the playwright comes and he's a nice guy usually ......I have never worked with him before but he doesn't have a bad reputation. So when he insists that the actor who's having trouble saying the word learn to say the word EXACTLY the way the writer wants it, well....there can be trouble.....Silleeee, not silly, the way everyone pronounces it, but silleeeee. What difference can it possibly make? Does it change the meaning of the line? No. No it affect the meaning of the play? No. Does it matter at all? NOOOO!
The writer is very, what's a good word?....pushy?....and wants to make sure that the actor learns the word just the right way even though I say you might consider just switching the word because, after all, that's what the actor is probably going to do on stage because in my 25 years as a director I found that when the actor is uncomfortable usually you find another word!
Now, you have to understand this is one of the finest actors we have in town....
This actor is so good, he was off book in the first week which even in this good company is very impressive. He has researched the role even so far as visiting with some of the people who do this kind of work in real life to get an idea of what it feels like to be a plumber.
So when an actor like this actually has a problem, I work with him or her and we figure out a way....and if the playwright is thankfully two thousand miles away..... then we just change the word.......but no! The playwright is in town! That is why I not like to do the work of local writers!!
(Getting a little wild-eyed)
So one word almost brings down the whole production!
Because the actor gets mad and he rest of the cast is going crazy watching this crap and the end result is nothing positive out of rehearsal which is why I brought this gun today!
You see my new directing technique is a bit more...how should I put it? Direct! So, the first person who argues with me it's going to have to answer not to me.... but to the gun!
(Smiles when seeing the reaction)
Before you think I'm gone ballistic this is not a gun with bullets - this is a paintball gun.
Anyone who argues with me over one word or another is going to get hit with this!
And if you're hit with five spots of paint today .....you will not get paid for today.... and I don't care! I just don't care what anyone says about it!
(Looks around wildly)
What are those men standing over there? Why is the police here? .....it's only a joke!.... that's the problem with the world today..... no one can take a joke!!
(He turns to leave, stops, looks back)
Silly me!
Because the actor gets mad and he rest of the cast is going crazy watching this crap and the end result is nothing positive out of rehearsal which is why I brought this gun today!
You see my new directing technique is a bit more...how should I put it? Direct! So, the first person who argues with me it's going to have to answer not to me.... but to the gun!
(Smiles when seeing the reaction)
Before you think I'm gone ballistic this is not a gun with bullets - this is a paintball gun.
Anyone who argues with me over one word or another is going to get hit with this!
And if you're hit with five spots of paint today .....you will not get paid for today.... and I don't care! I just don't care what anyone says about it!
(Looks around wildly)
What are those men standing over there? Why is the police here? .....it's only a joke!.... that's the problem with the world today..... no one can take a joke!!
(He turns to leave, stops, looks back)
Silly me!
(He exits to a nice quiet room)
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Janet S. Tiger 858-736-6315 CaregiversAnon.org
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Playwright-in-Residence
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8
