Monologue Mania

Monday, December 26, 2016

Monologue Mania Day #1048 The List (for Caregivers Anonymous) by Janet S. Tiger (c) Dec. 26, 2016

Welcome to Monologue Mania- one new free* monologue a day- -and still going!

first year - Feb. 13, 2014 - Feb. 12, 2015 second year - Feb. 13, 2015 - Feb. 12, 2016 third year - Feb. 13, 2016 - today! *********
I've continued with a monologue a day until the spirit moves me to stop, so if you have any ideas for a monologue you want me to write, please let me know at tigerteam1@gmail.com.

If you just started this blog and want to read the earlier monologues- for a list of the titles and blurbs from each day, click here There are now over 1030!

Get more great award-winning monologues - MonologueZone.com

If you'd like to write your own monologues, I happen to have a book for that -

How to Write a Monologue in 10 Easy Lessons (Well, maybe not so easy)

Thank you for your comments - and for liking and sharing this site. Wishing you much success!
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Monologue Mania Day #1048 The List (for Caregivers Anonymous) by Janet S. Tiger (c) Dec. 26, 2016

Background scene for Caregivers Anonymous

The List

(for Caregivers Anonymous)
©Janet S. Tiger all rights reserved

tigerteam1@gmail.com

(Jeannie, the leader of the group, motions for the others to be quiet, she waves some papers
at them)

JEANNIE - Now listen up! I have here the results of my very scientifically designed experiment with our fellow caregiver, Wanda.....where I offered to come to her house and write down everything she did as a caregiver.....and everything she did for herself......

WANDA - (Pretending to be annoyed) I thought you told me this was gonna be CONFIDENTIAL!

JEANNIE - I can explain that....

WANDA - Please do!

JEANNIE - I lied......

(The others hoot and Jeannie waves at them)

JEANNIE - Please listen! I think there is a great deal to learn from our Miss Wanda......This, my friends is the list of what she does for her husband all day......and this was only one day, mind you.....
(Reads) Wakes up.....I was there early so I know she gets up at 6am to do a load of wash......

WANDA - You make it sound like a crime!

JEANNIE - (Ignores her) And then you start breakfast for your husband, who is a TINY bit picky about how he likes his sausage EXTRA CRISPY.....

WANDA - (Automatic) But not burned....

JEANNIE - And his coffee with not one, but TWO artificial sweeteners......and just a splash of half and half!

WANDA - Oh, yeah!

JEANNIE - And before he eats, Wanda has to take him IN HIS WHEELCHAIR BECAUSE HE CANNOT WALK TOO FAR......to the bathroom.....where he needs help with brushing his teeth and then she helps dress him and then he gets wheeled into the kitchen where he can complain about how the toast is burnt!

WANDA - Because I took too long with the toothpaste!

JEANNIE - (Imitates her) Oh, yeah! And then there's the rest of the day, with the cream for the psoriasis, and the checking for bedsores, and the.......

(Holds up the papers)

JEANNIE - Does anyone want to hear the rest?

(She shows at least three pages, both sides, the others are adamant - NO!)

WANDA - (Laughing) You a mean one for sure!

JEANNIE - But wait...... now we have the list of what Wanda does for herself!

(She holds up a tiny post it note and the others howl with laughter)

JEANNIE - Oh, don't laugh, there's a lot on here! Just listen to breakfast......(reads) ....eats the leftovers from George's plate.......and for exercise.....oh, that's what folding the wash is good for! And for a break.....

(She turns over the paper)

JEANNIE - I guess that's all folks!

WANDA - And how come you forgot to mention I went to the ocean? Because Jeannie insisted I go while George was takin' a nap and she watched him!

JEANNIE - Wait a minute.....there it is! A whole 45 minutes!

WANDA - It only takes 15 minutes to go and 15 minutes to walk and 15 minutes to come home......

JEANNIE - Excuse me! I should have realized that you had all that lolling time......and when was the last time you went to the ocean - or a movie.....or to see a friend......or anywhere else by yourself.....Miss Wanda?

WANDA - (Mumbles)

JEANNIE - We can't hear you!

WANDA - All right! Maybe it's been a while.......you just don't let up do you,, girl! You're like a pitbull with a bad tooth! And maybe....you got a point......and maybe George has now agreed to let our kids get someone to help me out a day or two every week.....

(The others cheer)

JEANNIE - Well I'll be glad to give a hand until you find someone, you know that.....

WANDA - (Horrified) Oh, no, Jeannie! We gonna find somebody real fast!

JEANNIE - Someone different from me?

WANDA - (Really horrified) You did hear!

JEANNIE - George said something a tiny bit politically incorrect....

WANDA - Oh no!

(She hides her face and she and Jeannie start laughing)

JEANNIE - I thought I heard him say he didn't want ....how did he put it so delicately?

WANDA - (Shaking her head) Didn't want no white woman touchin' his privates!

(The others enjoy this and Wanda shakes her head again)

WANDA - But it worked......I mean, we got two women comin' over this week for interviews.....so maybe, just maybe, you were right.....

JEANNIE - The three words every woman wants to hear! Let's have a toast to Wanda getting a few minutes to herself.....how many years has it been?

WANDA - Too many!

(The others lift their coffee cups as the lights dim)

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* Note: A few words about 'free' - all these monologues are protected under copyright law and are free to read, free to perform and video as long as no money is charged. Once you charge admission or a donation, or include my work in an anthology, you need to contact me for royalty
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Janet S. Tiger 858-736-6315 CaregiversAnon.org

JanetSTigerMonologueMania.blogspot.com

www.JanetSTiger.weebly.com

Member Dramatists Guild since 1983

Playwright-in-Residence

Swedenborg Hall 2006-8

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Sunday, December 25, 2016

Monologue Mania Day #1047 A Great Miracle Happened Here by Janet S. Tiger (c) Dec. 25, 2016

Welcome to Monologue Mania- one new free* monologue a day- -and still going!

If you'd like to write your own monologues, I happen to have a book for that -

How to Write a Monologue in 10 Easy Lessons (Well, maybe not so easy)

Thank you for your comments - and for liking and sharing this site. Wishing you much success!
- -------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Monologue Mania Day #1047 A Great Miracle Happened Here by Janet S. Tiger (c) Dec. 25, 2016

A Great Miracle Happened Here

tigerteam1@gmail.com

              (A man comes onstage, he is wearing a yarmulke, dressed from the seventies, where this story exists. He is carrying an eight-branched menorah -the candle-holding device used during the holiday of Hanukah and a dreidel, the toy children and families play with during this holiday.

He sets the menorah on a table, and puts in seven candles, with one in the middle to light them. This will leave one empty spot on the end for another candle. He leans his head to pray silently for a moment, raises his head, he has a slight accent)

When the Rabbi asked me to talk about Hanukah, I wasn't sure what to say, because, although I've been a member here for many years......

             (He points into the audience)

........you all know my wife who makes the delicious kugel, and my two boys, one was just barmitzvah, you may have come to hear him, and get some kugel.....

But everyone knows that since the war, I have never been that observant anymore. After my family was murdered, this is easy to understand. Towards the end of the war, my father and I were the only two left of all of us, we had been eight, my parents and my five brothers and sisters, all gone. Just him and me left, working together in a camp.

And then one day, he was getting too weak, and they were taking him away, and .....he waved at me to keep working, but I went to stop the soldier, and...... he shot me. I could see my father's face as I fell, I knew it was the end for him, too.

But as you can see, I did not die. They hauled me bleeding to a hole and I was thrown in. The thing was, when I was a boy, we grew up in a village, surrounded by a forest. My father knew that forest well, we would hunt for food there, and he would teach me about the animals and the plants. He used to point out the possums, and he would say, (imitates father's voice) 'Look at that stupid animal! But it's not so stupid, it knows how to do one thing very well, and that thing is to play dead! And that one thing..... keeps it alive. Study this animal, the ability to play dead is a very important skill....as important as knowing when to fight.....'

        (He takes a deep breath, gets control of himself)

So I played dead, and they buried me in a, thank God, not too well packed grave. I waited, like a possum, until the night, and I crawled out. The bullet had gone through my side, thank God, and I was bloody, but it was summer, and I knew how to live in the forest. I was lucky, I met with others who did not kill me, and I survived, I searched for my father, but he was gone, too, so I was filled with pain, I no longer believed there was a God, and I vowed never to go to shul again.

But .......then, I came to this country, and I got married, and Deborah said if I didn't go to services, at least she would go with the children. I could agree to that.

The years go by, and, as some of you know, I have an import-export business with Europe and Israel. One time, I fly on the seventh night of Hanukah, which that year was on a Friday night, and on the plane, I sit next to a Chassid, and he liked to talk, and asked if I wanted to join him for Sabbath and Hanukah at his shul, not far from where my hotel was. I thanked him, did not even listen to which shul it was, and forgot it.

Anyone who has been to Israel, especially Jerusalem, knows it gets very quiet on Sabbath, so by the time I got settled, there was not much left to do except walk around.....and there I was in front of a small shul, and the candles were lit for Hanukah, and for some reason, I went in. It was like going back in time, a lot of the men there had numbers on their arms, just like mine....

           (He holds up his arm to show)

Everyone was very friendly. They wanted to know where I was from, and they gave me a seat near the front, and during Kaddish, when I stood, the man I met on the plane came up and hugged me, and stood with me. There were others standing for Kaddish, and there was something different that night, one older man stood up and started to speak about those he was saying Kaddish for. Like me, like a lot of the people there, it was for an entire family. His story was very sad.....

        (He is very affected by this)

His wife, his sons and daughters, all gone, and then, he said something that made me look up, look at him closely...... (imitates the voice of the man) 'my son died trying to save me, my son, may he rest in peace......Yitzhak ben Shmuel ....... of Lahkva.....'

   (He is frozen, still remembering the lightning bolt of that moment)

It was my name, and most of all.....my town......

I couldn't help it...... Are you Shmuel Rosenberg? He stared at me for a moment, the entire shul was silent for the first time that night, anyone who knows Jews knows how unusual that is......

We looked at each other and we both started to cry. I hugged him....Papa!.....

(He takes a kleenex and wipes his eyes)

It was my father! The truck he was put on to take him to his death, it slid into a ditch and he was thrown to the side......when they went to look at him.........he played dead. He heard the soldiers talking, and one of them was going to shoot my father, the other said, 'Don't waste your bullet on that Jew, let's go'

And they left......and my father lived! He survived in the same forests as I did, not twenty miles apart, each of us thinking the other was dead!

He had not even looked for me, because he had watched me die, so he came to Israel, and helped fight during the War for Independence, and he had been reckless, because he didn't care if he lived or died......but now, we found out that we had both played possum!

(He hangs his head, then raises it and laughs, holding up the dreidel)

So, why do I tell this story now? Because it was the seventh night of Hanukah, and some have argued that is the night of the biggest miracle, because no one knew if it would last till the end, it was a hope, a prayer, fanned by the first days, but that seventh night, if it had gone out then......so I say the words on the dreidel.......Nas Godole Haya Sham - a great miracle happened there.....

(He spins the dreidel, then turns to leave, stops, looks back)

My father got to see my children, his grandchildren .....which is the greatest miracle.....before he died....perhaps the point of such simple holidays is to remind us that miracles are everywhere.....my wife says the miracle is that......(smiling)....now I go to services with the rest of the family!

(He exits. Not the end of miracles!)

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Note- this was loosely based on a true story.

Wishing all a Happy Hanukah - with miracles that last throughout the entire year.

This was originally posted on Day #313 Dec. 22, 2014

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Janet S. Tiger 858-736-6315 CaregiversAnon.org

JanetSTigerMonologueMania.blogspot.com

www.JanetSTiger.weebly.com

Member Dramatists Guild since 1983

Playwright-in-Residence

Swedenborg Hall 2006-8

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Saturday, December 24, 2016

Monologue Mania Day #1046 The Christmas of the Ribbon Tree by Janet S. Tiger (c) Dec. 24, 2016

Welcome to Monologue Mania- one new free* monologue a day- -and still going!

If you'd like to write your own monologues, I happen to have a book for that -

How to Write a Monologue in 10 Easy Lessons (Well, maybe not so easy)

Thank you for your comments - and for liking and sharing this site. Wishing you much success!
- -------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Monologue Mania Day #1046 The Christmas of the Ribbon Tree by Janet S. Tiger (c) Dec. 24, 2016

The Christmas of the Ribbon Tree

by Janet S. Tiger
                                © 2015 all rights reserved
                                     tigerteam1@gmail.com

(This piece is designed for the Christmas holiday season and will work well if there is a tree for the actor to work with, decorating throughout the monologue. The actor enters, looking at the tree with awe, approaching with reverence and a box of ornaments, removing one of the ornaments and placing it on a branch)

That looks......perfect.

(Turns to the audience and smiles, offering an ornament)

Want to help? I'm happy to have some help.....put this anywhere you like......that's good! Good spot!

I'm sorry you won't be here for the big day, but this is almost as good, because it's fun just having you here alone, before the excitement.....And.don't worry, we won't miss the plane.....

(Taking out more decorations)

It's funny.....all the ornaments.....the tree.....I love it and yet.....for me, my favorite tree had none of these......

(Listens, laughs)

No, I suppose I never mentioned it...but when I was a little kid, right after my father died and we had to move because my mom got a job....to a town where we didn't know anyone. But it didn't pay much, so.....it was a very tough year.

Her first paycheck wasn't coming until the last day of December, so there was nothing.....no presents and not even a tree.....it was, in a word, depressing!

We went to school the morning of the 24th, which was a Friday, and at school there was a party, so at least we had some cookies, but it was horrible coming back to no presents, not even a tree.....we trudged home, the taste of the party turning sour as we walked in the snow, and we went slower and slower as we got closer to the apartment house........

(Slowly moving through the audience, head bowed)

And then we climbed the stairs.......and opened the door ......

(Back onstage, facing the audience, with an expression of wonder)

There it was! A Christmas tree! The most amazing tree we'd ever seen! Only there were no needles, because it was a tree unlike any other!

You see, my mother had come home from work, able to do so because the diner had closed early for Christmas Eve! And there had been a party at the diner, the owners had given out some small gifts and she had taken all the ribbons left over from all the presents, and had taped them onto our wall ....and she'd done it in the shape of a Christmas tree! She had taken some candles and put them around.......and......we ate some of the cake she brought home.

It was .....(getting teary)......incredible because she had captured the shape perfectly. With the lights turned off, and the candles......it was better than a real tree!

And....while we were singing carols and talking about the presents we would get .....next year, there was a knock at the door, and when Mom opened it, there were three of the other waitresses.....they had seen Mom taking the ribbons and they knew it was a hard Christmas, and they had brought us presents.......all wrapped......things we could not really use .....no mittens, no socks.....just pretty things and funny things and things we never would have bought for ourselves, like fancy bookmarks and coasters from Japan and ......a camera......a camera so we could take a picture of the first Christmas in our new home.

And so we did......

(Takes a photo out of a pocket and holds it out)

There we are, me and your aunts and uncles, and your grandmother with that silly expression on her face.......and the ribbon tree......

It's yours now......wherever you go, whatever battle you're in, I hope you can hold all that love close to your heart......

(Turns to leave, stops, looks back)

And please, there's one more thing.....

(Takes something from pocket, hands it over)

...take it......it's one of the ribbons from that tree.....to bring you home safe.......and wherever you are.....have a Merry Christmas!

(Exits...wishing all a Merry Christmas, and thanking my friend who actually made the ribbon tree)

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First posted Day # 673 The Christmas of the Ribbon Tree by Janet S. Tiger Dec. 16, 2015

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Janet S. Tiger 858-736-6315 CaregiversAnon.org

JanetSTigerMonologueMania.blogspot.com

www.JanetSTiger.weebly.com

Member Dramatists Guild since 1983

Playwright-in-Residence

Swedenborg Hall 2006-8

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Friday, December 23, 2016

Monologue Mania Day #1045 Christmas Evie by Janet S. Tiger (c) Dec. 23, 2016

Welcome to Monologue Mania- one new free* monologue a day- -and still going!

If you'd like to write your own monologues, I happen to have a book for that -

How to Write a Monologue in 10 Easy Lessons (Well, maybe not so easy)

Thank you for your comments - and for liking and sharing this site. Wishing you much success!
- -------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Monologue Mania Day #1045 Christmas Evie by Janet S. Tiger (c) Dec. 23, 2016

Christmas Evie
(for Caregivers Anonymous)

tigerteam1@gmail.com

            (A middle-aged Asian woman enters, she is carrying a big tray of donuts. She smiles, hands them out.)

Sorry couldn't be here on time for party, but wanted everyone to know that I love everyone here!

Here, take two, take some home!

           (Listens, nods)

New people! Sure, tell story! Love to tell story about Christmas!

Is story about my donut shop, and customer who very strange. Story starts twenty years ago, when I first buy shop from Mr. Cho, who was going back to live in Cambodia. Have no idea why. Cambodia not as good as here. But he was selling, and my husband and me, we buy, because we not want to have cleaning business anymore. Too hard driving around, cleaning up other people mess. Stay in one place, better.

So my husband do baking at night, I in store during day, no business. See story on news about lady, Mrs. Field, who give away cookies, make lotsa money. My husband laugh, say stupid idea, give away food, no money! I say, but people like food, they buy, so I decide to try. Not tell him, he would say no, he stupid sometimes, good man, but not like to try new idea. I say, why come to new country and not try new idea?

So I look at people coming by, who will I give free donut to? Who look like they might want donut? Hard to decide. Day go by, hard to figure out. Then I see lady who go by every day. She checker at Von's, I know because I sometimes buy things at Von's, go through her line. She got hard eye, but sometimes, other worker there say something, she laugh big, so I know maybe inside, she not so bad.

Also, I notice, when she walk by, she look in window. So that day, I see her coming, I make decision. Which donut good for her? Which one will she like? She no look like chocolate lover, she look like....caramel glaze.....so I take one from display, put it in wax paper, and as she go by, I say to her, 'Merry Christmas' because it was Christmas time, and I know everyone love Christmas here.

She look at me funny, and I say, real quick, 'no pay, gift, for holiday.'

She was surprise, and take bite, her whole face changed. Like a happy face for a minute, then she back to herself, stone face.

'Thank you' she say to me, 'maybe I come back get some' 'Thank you,'I say' you have nice day. I hear people say that all time, so I say, too.

She go away, but then every day, she come back and get donut. Only 25 cent back then for one donut, not expensive. We no talk, she not like some customers who stay for long time, tell me silly story and think I understand, I just nod and say, 'oh, very interesting' when they take breath. I pray for more customer so I don't have to listen.

But this lady, she never say anything, except one day, when price go up to thirty-five cent, and I tell her, she look at me and say, 'oh' and then she ask my name. My name is long, so I just tell her, 'Sue' my name Sue. She not tell her name, I don't care, not remember anyhow, too many names to remember.

Year go by, many year. Donut cost fifty cent, she make face, then seventy-five cent, make another face, now donut is 95 cent, plus tax.....she not happy, but every day, I make sure she get her donut. I watch for her, make sure that donut is right off rack, nice and warm, in front of window where she can see....she cannot resist! (Giggles) She start to get little heavy, I know she blame donut, but one donut a day not problem! (Giggles) I can see she still mad, other customer say she call me devil, but I don't care. I figure out, she buy one donut every day for 20 year, good customer, no matter what she say!

          (She wipes her hands on her apron. This is hard to remember)

Then, three year ago, Christmas Eve, very bad day for me. Husband yell in morning, we usually not fight, but he drop big tray of donuts, hit head, yell at me, like my fault! I mad at him, we yell, still mad when he go home. Then I get call from daughter....

           (She puts a hand to one ear like a phone, stops, takes deep breath)

Not good, husband in hospital, going to surgery! Can't move legs! Bad, very bad!

           (She puts down phone, whirls around)

What can I do? I cannot close shop and go to hospital - machines are on, ovens on, making lots of donuts for Christmas, big day for donuts! Give donuts to church for poor people dinner! What can I do? I have to stay until Eddie come, he man who finish donuts when I leave. Cannot reach Eddie! Christmas Eve! Am very upset! And then....

           (She turns and sees someone!)

Glaze caramel lady.....

   (Talks to her)

Sorry, cannot help today, husband sick!

And I tell her what happening and something strange happen.....she hugs me....

          (She puts her arms around herself, remembering)

No customer ever hug me, I always covered in flour....but she hug me and she say, I know about sick husband, you go to hospital, I stay here, watch for Eddie. You go, take care of husband....

I was, how you say...stunned! But you don't have to help customers.....I tell her and she say, I can figure out how to work register, been checker twenty-five years! And I know your donuts.....

         (She pats her hip)

And she pat hip and we both laugh.    And I say, but how can I pay you? Then she say, you don't have to pay me.....you don't have to pay friend.

How do you like that? I have friend, not even know it. I tell her, at least, have your favorite donut - no charge, after twenty year, take whole tray!

So I show her how to open cash register, and I give her my phone number and take her number and then I realize, I do not know her name! What your name? I ask, and she say, (imitates) My name is Ev-e-lyn, but my friends call me...Evie, like Christmas Eve......

          (She takes apron, wipes eyes)

So that story. Good story for Christmas, right? Got to go now, lots to do for Christmas.....

           (She turns to leave, stops, looks back)

And other end to story, Evie retire from Von's last year, now guess where she work? You got it! She work in Donut Shop, so I can take care of husband.......and best thing, she can have all donut she want! And she still call me devil, I laugh, say, have another donut.......my friend.....

(She exits)

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good bite....of a donut!

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History of this monologue -
first published Monologue Mania Day #314 Christmas Evie Dec. 23, 2014

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Janet S. Tiger 858-736-6315 CaregiversAnon.org

JanetSTigerMonologueMania.blogspot.com

www.JanetSTiger.weebly.com

Member Dramatists Guild since 1983

Playwright-in-Residence

Swedenborg Hall 2006-8

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Thursday, December 22, 2016

Monologue Mania Day #1044 Alphonso and the Flying Tomatoes by Janet S. Tiger (c) Dec. 22, 2016

Welcome to Monologue Mania- one new free* monologue a day- -and still going!

If you'd like to write your own monologues, I happen to have a book for that -

How to Write a Monologue in 10 Easy Lessons (Well, maybe not so easy)

Thank you for your comments - and for liking and sharing this site. Wishing you much success!
- -------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Monologue Mania Day #1044 Alphonso and the Flying Tomatoes by Janet S. Tiger (c) Dec. 22, 2016

Alphonso and the Flying Tomatoes

tigerteam1@gmail.com

(The circus performer enters with a flourish - perhaps with a cape? - and bows to the audience. Thick Italian accent helps, too)

Ladeez and chentlemen! Please welcome my brothers.....

(Indicates others entering)

Luigi.....Angelo.....Martini.....and the youngest.....Guiseppe! And I ....I....am Alphonso......Together we are...

Alphonso and the Flying Tomatoes!

(A few flips and somersaults will help)

We are the famous Salsa family........we dress in red because......tomatoes are red! And we are passionate about flying.......so we wear.....the color of brilliance, the color of love.....the color of passion!

Together on the trapezes above!.... we will fly into your imagination ...into your dreams.....and into your hearts........

(He turns to leave, stops, looks back)

And if we fall......we make a hellavu sauce for your pasta!

(He somersaults off....or is it somersauces off -sorry)

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Janet S. Tiger 858-736-6315 CaregiversAnon.org

JanetSTigerMonologueMania.blogspot.com

www.JanetSTiger.weebly.com

Member Dramatists Guild since 1983

Playwright-in-Residence

Swedenborg Hall 2006-8

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